I feel alone.
And I don’t mean that I feel lonely. I’m currently immersed in the boisterous buzz of caffeinated clientele, and I am more than content to sit in the comforting company of my compatriots. But as I look around at the growing crowd of camel-colored cappuccino cups, I can’t help but notice that there is nobody else in here who’s just like me.
Sometimes I let this thought walk me out onto a limb of inescapable isolation. There is nobody else who’s doing exactly what I’m doing. There is nobody else who’s feeling exactly what I’m feeling. There is nobody else who’s being exactly what I’m being. And when this is true, I have no rational choice but to accept that I am forever and always all by myself.
Being with this thought is an all-consuming experience. I notice my heart longing to melt into the security of a socially sanctioned self. I notice my mind planning to rewrite my personality in line with a more inconspicuous identity. I notice my body wanting to put its feet down on some eternally stable sense of who I am.
Yet I know that none of these things will make it any better. I know that I can spend the rest of my life adjusting myself to fit an artificial archetype of everything I think I should be, and I know that I will always fall short. I know that the only thing I can ever really be is me, whatever that means.
So maybe I can turn that thought around. Maybe it’s not a curse to be unique, maybe it’s a blessing. Maybe this existential awareness is just an invitation for me to be more authentic. Maybe I’M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE OTHER PEOPLE.
And as my nervous system unwinds, suddenly I realize that everyone else is alone in the same way. I remember that alone is a contraction of “all one.” I look around and notice how everyone here is just like me. I giggle about how funny it is to be human, how we can spend so much of our energy trying to copy one another when all we ever really want to do is relax into ourselves.
We all have the chance to embrace our authenticity this month with today’s New Moon in Aquarius. Aquarius is a place of ironclad intellectual integrity, and it’s where we come to appreciate that our thoughts crystallize into the internal laws we live by. Aquarius builds our mental structure from the beliefs we hold about ourselves and the world around us, and its New Moon gives us the chance to press the eject button on rigid ideas that no longer gel with our identity.
With Saturn - the ruler of Aquarius - bathing in the limitlessly divine flow of Pisces, I find myself wondering if it ever helps to have fixed notions of how I relate to my internal and external worlds. I see this so acutely in my work, where job titles endlessly elude me. This year alone, I have called myself: Practical Astrologer, Intuitive Astrologer, Spiritual Astrologer, Energy Healer, Energy Coach, Intuitive Coach, Spiritual Life Coach, Quantum Coach, Quantum Dreamer, and even Time Magician.
As much as I know that these ever-changing monikers capture my personal and professional development, I also wonder what I’m trying to establish here. Other people seem to find it much more comfortable when I give them a concrete definition of what I do, and perhaps I find that more comfortable, too. But what would it be like if I gave myself full permission to share whatever words felt right about my work in the moment? What if I allowed my job titles to drip and drain without attachment?
This feels like a passport to authenticity. We all know that we are not our job titles, and maybe me letting go of mine can help you to let go of yours, too. I know in my heart that the world wants nothing more than for you to be yourself, and this is most certainly what I want for you, too. So as I remind myself every time the Sun comes into Aquarius: You don’t have to identify as anything other than yourself.
If you’d like to relax more into the authenticity of who you are, I invite you to experience it directly in a free recorded meditation with me. I guide you to connect with the pure light of who you are, and you’ll get to know more about what Aquarius offers us in the longer-term cosmic cycles at play in the skies above. We also talk more about today’s Aquarius New Moon in the Weekly Oracle as we consider how to let unfulfilled expectations wash away our suffering.
Love,
Patrick
Free Meditation: Authenticity in Aquarius
Aquarius is taking over the airwaves. With long-term planetary cycles pointing to this most authentic of signs, it's time to connect with our own unique light. Aquarius knows that when you shine, we all shine together. Tune into a stellar energy meditation starting at 11:00 to broadcast the light of Aquarius into your cells and the world around you.
Weekly Oracle
This week we tap into the full potential of the New Moon in Aquarius, and we appreciate how we can let disappointment lead us into a greater understanding of who we really are. We get riled up about the ways we see our fellow humans treating each other as Mars enters Aquarius, and we come back to a place of compassionate inquiry with Saturn in Pisces.
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